We’d just left after seeing our granddaughters in a play in Ann Arbor on a Sunday. We were thirsty, so got off the freeway to stop at McDonald’s.
I rarely carry cash, but this time I had and went in clutching all of it — a $10, $5 and $1 bill. Inside, I ordered drinks at the kiosk, then decided to hit the restrooms while I waited to pay and get the cups. In the bathroom, I noticed one of the stalls was occupied. Later as I was washing my hands, a woman emerged from that closed door. I heard before I saw that she was crying, her hands to her forehead. In retrospect, I realized there’d been no such sound until she came out.
“I hate to ask you this,” she started, between sobs, “but I’m staying at the Fairfield Inn and I have no money left in my bank account. Could you…?”
I immediately pressed all $16 in her hands as I belatedly — sheepishly — realized I had not yet paid for my order and had not brought my purse so I could use a card instead. “Oh, but I still need $3 for my order,” I said ruefully and pulled the $5 bill back. I impulsively gave her a hug and told her I was sorry things were so hard. She seemed disaffected. Something felt off. Or maybe I’d overstepped. I said goodbye and went back to the lobby.
While I was in line waiting to pay, I saw her come out and sit at a table. The guy in front of me was quite talkative, telling me how a friend of his worked for a major beer manufacturer and when there was a malfunction at the plant, his friend gave him 100 cases of unsellable beer and he sold it to U-M students for $10 a case. It was a long wait. Finally, I was able to pay, fill my drinks and leave. I looked around thinking to give her the little bit of money that was left, but she’d gone.
As I thought about it later, I wondered if I’d been had. It wasn’t the money — $11, after all. But I hate being gullible and as hard as I try not to, seem to skew in that direction more often than not.
But then I remembered something that happened when I spent a few months at an agency that provides financial assistance, food and furniture to those who need it. Occasionally, it would come up that a client might be misrepresenting his or her situation to illegitimately qualify for services. Once when it was discussed at a meeting, one of the leaders reminded the group that the organization’s founder, a generous and spiritual man, had a philosophy that he was going to do the right thing given the circumstances as they appeared. If someone was scamming him, that was on them. But he would give with an open heart, believing the best of people. End of story.
That’s how I want to look at the world too. Anyway, would I rather think of her as being in extreme dire straits as I’d believed or really not as bad off and just trying to make an extra buck? For $11, I pick the latter.