A few months ago I started writing a show called “The Word Search” for a podcast company called GoKidGo.
Some episodes have even gone on the air. So far no one has told me “Stop, kid, stop!” so I figure I’m doing all right.
It’s interesting, making a podcast. It’s hard to write the scripts, and it’s tough to get them produced, and in between it’s no cakewalk, either.
I mean, I can go to the sound editor and say “Right after the first act, I need to hear an anthropomorphic cuckoo clock do a cartwheel.”
And she’ll make the effect, no problem. It sounds exactly like an anthropomorphic cuckoo clock doing a cartwheel.
But when I ask if a certain character’s voice can be a little less hesitant, she shakes her head. That’s something I need to take to the voice actors.
I’d describe one of the actors as a cuckoo clock, only without the clock.
“Where’s the fundamental dramatic question behind ‘The Word Search’?” he asks.
“There is none,” I answer. “This is a show about vocabulary. Every episode teaches a new word, with loads of jokes and puns thrown in.”
“Yeah, yeah, OK, but is there like unrequited love or crushing grief or something?”
“No. The four characters are friends who go on adventures to solve lexical mysteries.”
“Wouldn’t it be more interesting if everyone died at the end?” And so on and so forth.
GoKidGo airs a new episode every week, and I fend off these types of questions at least five times as often.
Let me give the aspiring children’s podcast writers out there a word of advice.
Remember that behind every actor is someone who wishes they were Hamlet, Tom Cruise or both at the same time.
I aspire to that, too. Not being Tom Cruise, I mean.
But I wouldn’t say no to things associated with Tom Cruise, like having tons of money and the knowledge that millions of people enjoyed my work.
It’d be a great honor to have everyone in the United States listen to my podcast.
Then I could gradually introduce subliminal messaging and build up an army of fans who would do anything to — ahem. I’m getting ahead of myself.
I have to be reasonable. Maybe I won’t ever have 500 fans fall over themselves to get me to autograph their faces, but perhaps I can have five. In 100 years. If I’m optimistic.
While “The Word Search” may not be my ticket to stardom, it’s still been a lot of fun. I learned a ton about podcasting, and I got to work with a bunch of interesting people, cuckoo clocks and all.
And now I can officially say that I have experience in entertainment.
So if you happen to be Steven Spielberg, Tom Cruise or Hamlet, drop me a line.
Alexandra Paskhaver is a software engineer and writer. For more information, check out her website at https://apaskhaver.github.io.