My husband and I have something we call the “good neighbor test.” When we’re talking about someone, usually a celebrity, we decide whether or not they’d be a good neighbor. (Like there is a chance in H-E-double hockey sticks that we’ll live in a neighborhood high-end enough to have a celebrity neighbor, but whatever. It keeps us entertained.)
We agree Henry Winkler would be a good neighbor and it would most likely be a blast sharing a driveway with Phyllis Diller or Carol Burnett. We’re not too sure about Frank Sinatra, although we’re guessing he’d give everyone on the block very nice Christmas cards.
Of course, most of the celebrities we discuss have passed away, but if they were still with us, we are sure many of them would be interesting to have next door.
I was thinking about our good neighbor test the last time I was on Amazon ordering something I wanted but didn’t really need and the person who started Amazon came to mind. Would Jeff Bezos make a good neighbor? He falls into the highly doubtful category of our test. I can’t recall ever reading anything positive about him and he seems like he might be the kind of neighbor who complains if the garbage cans are left on the curb too long.
I’m guessing how much our dogs bark wouldn’t thrill him either. His ex-wife, who has turned into a major philanthropist, would be a great neighbor but Bezos? The jury is out on that one.
But in spite of not being sure about living next door to him, I’ve got to say he really came up with a winner when he and his ex-wife started Amazon. There’s something about ordering yourself a gift on Friday and having it show up Sunday afternoon that tickles most of us pink. It’s like having your birthday all year round without getting any older.
There are times though when I wonder about the wisdom of treating yourself so often. It reminds me of how Halloween candy and Easter baskets filled with pastel chocolate eggs used to be special. Not so much anymore since people eat (a lot) of candy constantly, regardless of whether it’s a holiday or not.
Same thing with turkey stuffing, which used to be the highlight of Thanksgiving for many of us. Ever since Stovetop Stuffing became a thing, the thrill of real stuffing went away. Is it possible the same thing will happen if we keep on buying presents for ourselves via Amazon whenever the mood moves us? Will there come a day when getting that package with the Amazon smile on it won’t elicit quite so much joy but instead a “Ho hum, what was it I ordered?” response?
I’ve heard of a no-spend challenge, where you limit yourself to spending money on nothing but the essentials for, say, six months. It’s not a bad idea because when the time frame is over, shopping on Amazon would be all the sweeter.
I believe the old-fashioned term for it is self-control and I also believe it’s something a lot of us could use some work on. Being one of them, I feel their pain.
Back to Jeff Bezos. According to Google, he currently owns three mansions, all on islands and/or in gated communities. I don’t think I need to wonder what kind of neighbor he’d make. The odds of moving to an island are slim to none and the only way we’ll ever live in a gated community is if we commit a major felony.
I think we’ll stay in our own neighborhood for the time being where no one ever complains if we don’t pull the garbage cans in right away.